Dear New Military Spouse:  This Is My Promise To You

Dear New Military Spouse,

I write this letter to you with great hope as you enter an exciting, unfamiliar world known as the military lifestyle.  You and I will one day meet, most inevitably at a command function or a family social event.  You will probably be nervous, skeptical, and perhaps feel a bit uneasy at that first event.  I dare say this because that’s how I felt so many years ago.  But let me make you aware of the amazing family you have married into.  The military family - or in my case, the Navy family - knows no limits.  We are stationed all over the world.  We come in all different shapes, sizes, races, and sexuality.  Many have children, some nuclear, some becoming parents in other amazing ways.  Yet we are bound together by one immeasurable, unbreakable bond, and this is my promise to you: 

I promise to introduce myself at command events or social functions.  I will ask you questions because I want you to know you are an important part of the command family.  I will ask you questions about you. 

I promise to extend an invitation to the next Family Readiness Group meeting.  Whether you choose to attend on a regular basis is up to you, but I want to help introduce you to some of the many resources available to you as a military spouse, and the opportunity to meet other spouses from the command. Bonus: snacks are usually provided. 

I promise to open my Rolodex of information to you.  No one military spouse has the answer, no matter how long he or she has been a part of this lifestyle.  But I have met some of the most amazing people since marrying my husband, and I am happy to direct you to them should you ever require their assistance or services. 

I promise to provide local information.  Moving to a new city, new state, or even new country can be scary.  I will help you find a Target, Starbucks, Walmart, the NEX, and the base commissary. 

I promise to make sure you have an understanding of what emergency services are available to you.  You will quickly find that your Command Family Ombudsman will be your lifeline in times of crisis or emergency.  I will gladly introduce you to the Ombudsman if it helps. 

I promise to support you.  I do not care what rate or rank your spouse is, you have my unconditional support. 

I promise to stand by you.  You are a part of a fiercely independent, yet dependent family.  We will rally around fellow spouses in times of sadness, emergency, or crisis.  You will never be alone, 

I promise not to judge you.  Oh the mistakes I made as a new Navy spouse!  I was corrected, I was made to feel dumb for simply not knowing.  You have my word that I will not do the same.  I will offer guidance.

I promise you this won’t be easy. But I swear to you, it will be worth it. 

I promise you will make some of the most wonderful friends you could ever hope for.  Perhaps I will be one of them. 

I promise to hold your hand on the pier. We will laugh together through the tears and will rejoice in their Homecomings. 

These promises will be upheld by all spouses, near and far, young and not-so-young.  We are your new family and we are excited to welcome you to it.

With my kindest regards,
A Navy Spouse